A self-satirical train wreck that you can witness word by word...
And for those who doubt my son Armand Bovoso, indeed he is part Black. I'm Black and Italian. Armand is Black, italian, and Ukranian Jewish. Send me an email if you can't accept this.
And for those who doubt my son Armand Bovoso, indeed he is part Black. I'm Black and Italian. Armand is Black, italian, and Ukranian Jewish. Send me an email if you can't accept this.
There's nothing like a smoking hot woman to make you feel good...
Published Wednesday, August 31, 2005 by Alessandro Ashanti.
So one of my friends and sometimes student T. has become addicted to my blog. T. also just happens to be one of the most beautiful women I know. She posted this message to my Myspace.com page. "your blog is currently my favorite read. i check in regularly. daily even. and you always provide the most satisfying topics and insights. the sudden influx of comments from the non-blogger "t." are indeed mine [though i'm sure you had no difficulty figuring out that little puzzle]. congrats on being awesome."
Suddenly I feel like a celebrity. That's right! In your face, all of those who teased me as a fat kid in P.S. 3! I'm da man!!
So, as with most things in life you have to take your props as they come. Not 30 minutes later I received this message from her:
"alessandro you started high school the year i was born. damn. "
Oh well. Pop goes that bubble. I feel old.
If you've found my blog and happened to know me from 2000-2004 let me just say that you have my deepest apologies. If I owe you money, left you in a bad position, hurt you, or failed to meet your expectations, please contact me and let me know how I can make amends.
-A much more centered Alessandro
-A much more centered Alessandro
Now we come to me. I have always loved writing since I was first asked to come up with creative stories in elementary school. I've dabbled in fiction, poetry, prose, short stories, screen plays, comic books, and psychotic ramblings. Last year I decided to start posting a blog on a whim. As I told my mother a month later, I had finally found my medium. Sorry great great grandmother. I know it's a long way away from The Autobiography of Martin Delaney. I know this effectively ends the writing legacy of the family.
That sound you just heard is my great great grand mother trying to dig her grave deeper.
When I was 21 I had 14 inches. I wore them proud. I managed to hold on to my full 14 inches throughout most of my 20's until my stomach went through the great expansion period. My 14 inches began to shrink. I went down to ten. Not so bad. Then down to 5. Uh oh. Finally, when my stomach could go out no further, I was down to 3 inches. Devastation.
Just 3 inches left. Let me show you.
Here's me at 24, still sporting my 14 inches. Tengo mas macho.
My 10 inches is lost to history. Let's check me out at 5.
Nice hair. Hmmm. That explains why, during a seminar I taught at Florida International University, I was referred to as the "Cypress Hill Sensei".
Here I am at 3 inches. Well most likely it was 2 as I was in the water. Have to count for shrinkage.
I know I'm back to a better size these days. Exactly how big I don't know. I'll have to get my ruler out. Can't believe I still have the same belt after all these years.
Just 3 inches left. Let me show you.
Here's me at 24, still sporting my 14 inches. Tengo mas macho.
My 10 inches is lost to history. Let's check me out at 5.
Nice hair. Hmmm. That explains why, during a seminar I taught at Florida International University, I was referred to as the "Cypress Hill Sensei".
Here I am at 3 inches. Well most likely it was 2 as I was in the water. Have to count for shrinkage.
I know I'm back to a better size these days. Exactly how big I don't know. I'll have to get my ruler out. Can't believe I still have the same belt after all these years.
This was sent to me by my friend Michele. I got a big kick out of it. You can check out her blog at http://blogontheweb.com/michiewah/
> ...RING))))....RING))))....RING))))....,
>
>**Pick Up** "Hello?"
>
>"Hi honey, this is Daddy, Is Mommy near the phone?"
>
>"No Daddy, She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Frank"
>
>After a brief pause, Daddy says, "But honey, you haven't got an Uncle Frank"
>
>"Oh yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room with Mommy, right now"
>
>Brief Pause
>
>"Uh, okay then, .this is what I want you to do. Put the phone down on
>the table, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door, and shout to
>Mommy that Daddy's car just pulled into the driveway"
>
>"Okay Daddy, just a minute"
>
>A few minutes later the little girl comes back to the phone.
>
>"I did it Daddy"
>
>"And what happened honey?" he asked
>
>"Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped ou! t of bed with no clothes on
>and ran around screaming. Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on
> the dresser and now she isn't moving at all!"
>
>"Oh my God!!! What about your Uncle Frank?"
>
>"He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on too. He was all scared
> and he jumped out of the back window and into the swimming pool. But I
>guess he didn't know that you took out the water last week to clean it,
>he hit the bottom of the pool and I think he's dead"
>
>***Long Pause***
>
>***Longer Pause***
>
> Then Daddy says,
>
">Swimming pool??...Is this 555-7039??"
> ...RING))))....RING))))....RING))))....,
>
>**Pick Up** "Hello?"
>
>"Hi honey, this is Daddy, Is Mommy near the phone?"
>
>"No Daddy, She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Frank"
>
>After a brief pause, Daddy says, "But honey, you haven't got an Uncle Frank"
>
>"Oh yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room with Mommy, right now"
>
>Brief Pause
>
>"Uh, okay then, .this is what I want you to do. Put the phone down on
>the table, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door, and shout to
>Mommy that Daddy's car just pulled into the driveway"
>
>"Okay Daddy, just a minute"
>
>A few minutes later the little girl comes back to the phone.
>
>"I did it Daddy"
>
>"And what happened honey?" he asked
>
>"Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped ou! t of bed with no clothes on
>and ran around screaming. Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on
> the dresser and now she isn't moving at all!"
>
>"Oh my God!!! What about your Uncle Frank?"
>
>"He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on too. He was all scared
> and he jumped out of the back window and into the swimming pool. But I
>guess he didn't know that you took out the water last week to clean it,
>he hit the bottom of the pool and I think he's dead"
>
>***Long Pause***
>
>***Longer Pause***
>
> Then Daddy says,
>
">Swimming pool??...Is this 555-7039??"
If anyone ever wonders why I'm a vegan...
Published Saturday, August 27, 2005 by Alessandro Ashanti.
Well not exactly. It has nothing to do with my father. I was born Alessandro Lee Bovoso. My mother chose my first name which is the Italian pronounciation of Alexander. Other variations include Alejandro (Spanish), and just about any "Ale" you can think of. The name was also apparently my father's grandmother's maiden name. I think that was coincidental. My mother had no knowledge of it. My middle name, Lee, was a nick name that my Aunt Elizabeth (father's sister) used. It also had the phonetic pronounciation of a family name on my mother's side, Leigh. Now we come to the creme de la creme. My last name. Bovoso. For years I thought Bovoso was an Italian name until I was told by some of my Italian relatives that all Italian names have some meaning. They all are literal. Like Drea DeMatteo = Drea of Matthew. Bovoso has no meaning. I asked my father about this and he mentioned that the name was most likely Albanese (in this case pronounced Albanayse). Meaning that one of our ancestors came from Albania. Apparently large segment off the Italian population has this in common. See http://www.answers.com/topic/arb-resh for more information. So more likely than not Bovoso is a name of Albanian ancestry.
OK. With the context laid out let me tell you my only dilemma with my given surname. I grew up in New York City where, at the time, the majority of Spanish speakers were from the Caribbean. When I moved to California I became aware that terminology in Spanish changes from region to region. In California the majority of Spanish speakers are from Mexico and Central America (Mexico is in North America for those of you who flunked geography). It was out here that I found out my last name is waaaaayyy to close in pronounciation to a word that no one wants to be called in Spanish. Baboso. For those of you who can't translate this wonderful word, it roughly means, "slobbering idiot." Imagine my pleasure when I found this out! To make matters worse I wind up moving to Los Angeles which has a 40 percent Latino population. Everywhere I have to give my legal name there is someone ready to laugh at me.
One time I had run out of gas on the side of the road and called AAA to come help me out. After a short wait a tow truck shows up ready to help. The driver gets out and already he's laughing.
"What's your name?", he says chuckling away.
With a deep sigh I say, "Alessandro."
"No, I mean your last name. Cause they told me that A. Baboso was in trouble and needed help!" The driver laughed so hard I almost had to pick him off the ground to save him from choking on his own saliva.
Oh it's endless down here. Let me tell you. Just today I had to pick up some prescription cream for my butt (I spare you the details of this one) at Rite Aid. The pharmacy usually has 3-4 employees working. There is an Indian man, black woman, Latino woman, and an Asian pharmacist. Without fail the Latino woman will always wind up helping me out.
"Last name?", she said.
"Bovoso", I said, trying my best to pronounce the O's clearly.
She turned around to search for the prescription and was polite enough about it. When she came back with my drugs I swear to you that I could see a trickle of blood protruding from her lip due to all the biting she must have done.
So as you can imagine I use Alessandro Ashanti where ever I can. I'll give you the low down on the Ashanti name another time.
OK. With the context laid out let me tell you my only dilemma with my given surname. I grew up in New York City where, at the time, the majority of Spanish speakers were from the Caribbean. When I moved to California I became aware that terminology in Spanish changes from region to region. In California the majority of Spanish speakers are from Mexico and Central America (Mexico is in North America for those of you who flunked geography). It was out here that I found out my last name is waaaaayyy to close in pronounciation to a word that no one wants to be called in Spanish. Baboso. For those of you who can't translate this wonderful word, it roughly means, "slobbering idiot." Imagine my pleasure when I found this out! To make matters worse I wind up moving to Los Angeles which has a 40 percent Latino population. Everywhere I have to give my legal name there is someone ready to laugh at me.
One time I had run out of gas on the side of the road and called AAA to come help me out. After a short wait a tow truck shows up ready to help. The driver gets out and already he's laughing.
"What's your name?", he says chuckling away.
With a deep sigh I say, "Alessandro."
"No, I mean your last name. Cause they told me that A. Baboso was in trouble and needed help!" The driver laughed so hard I almost had to pick him off the ground to save him from choking on his own saliva.
Oh it's endless down here. Let me tell you. Just today I had to pick up some prescription cream for my butt (I spare you the details of this one) at Rite Aid. The pharmacy usually has 3-4 employees working. There is an Indian man, black woman, Latino woman, and an Asian pharmacist. Without fail the Latino woman will always wind up helping me out.
"Last name?", she said.
"Bovoso", I said, trying my best to pronounce the O's clearly.
She turned around to search for the prescription and was polite enough about it. When she came back with my drugs I swear to you that I could see a trickle of blood protruding from her lip due to all the biting she must have done.
So as you can imagine I use Alessandro Ashanti where ever I can. I'll give you the low down on the Ashanti name another time.
Me and my ex-wife. One of us is 8 months pregnant in this picture. Even I couldn't tell you who.
Where the fuck is this guy's neck?
Charming.
I was asked in the comments of my last post by PBT for advice on loosing weight. (She also called me handsome. I'll be riding high off of that one for the next week. Sorry KS. Your girlfriend is hot!)
Let me start with some history on my weight gain. As a little kid I was pretty chunky. Unfortunately I was the "fat kid" at my elementary school. That was bad. It was even worse because I didn't know how to stick up for myself. As I grew older I slimed out more but wasn't in any kind of shape until I started doing martial arts as a teenager. My diet had a few parameters right after I began martial arts training. No red meat, no pork. Everything else was fair game. I leaned out pretty nicely but I had a very young metabolism. When I turned 23 I had a major life change due to the reading of a brilliant book called Diet for a New America by Harold Robbins (http://www.veganessentials.com/catalog/diet-for-a-new-America). Harold himself was the heir to the Baskin-Robbins fortune which he declined to take a penny of due to his beliefs. The book changed my life forever. I immediately became a vegan. I lost even more weight during this time partly due to the fact that I wasn't training that much. When I got back into heavy training I became and even healthier guy. Here's me at 25.
I felt like quite the hot shot. Truth be told this isn't even me at the high of being in shape. The next year I discovered my Capoeira Angola training. I was training several times a day then.
Fast forward my move from San Francisco to Los Angeles. In San Francisco I had the vegan thing down. I knew exactly where to go and what to eat. I also knew how to find it for cheap. LA had a completely different set of rules where food was concerned. Unless you were on the West Side healthy food was very hard to come by. Health food stores charged and arm and a leg. No one knew what to make of my eating choices. I also didn't know the area very well. Somehow slowly but surely I wind up eating meats, eggs, and dairy again. I suspect this is partly due to being around my ex-wife but I really can't blame her. I also began working full time in the entertainment industry as a computer guy. Translation: I sat down most of the time and ate out every day. With no eating philosophy I quickly began gaining weight. Fast forward again to me taking a job working the Help Desk (sitting down all day) at Dreamworks SKG. Dreamworks had the most amazing perk for it's employees. Completely free breakfast and lunch. There was a 4 million dollar food budget and a kitchen staff with a head chef. Man was the food good. There were also soda fountains and bulk snacks in every kitchenette. For the 18 months I was there I ballooned to over 200 pounds.
Fast forward to one of the major events in my life. Contracting double pneumonia. I'll save the details of the illness for another post but here's the correlation to this one. After having my lungs shut down on me I was left with little breathing capacity. I had to sit on a couch for 4 months and take massive amounts of steroids and other things to get me healthy again. Psychologically, becoming out of breath scared the hell out of me. My weight piled on at about 5 pounds a month. I topped out at 247 pounds. You can see pics in my posts below.
It felt helpless. I was on Paxil because I was so depressed (one of the major side effects of paxil is weight gain) and became incredibly gluttonous. I also lost all caring for my appearance. One day I had had enough and slowly started a transformation. I cut my hair and went shopping for new clothes. I was still fat but I looked better. I tried some diet restrictions but nothing worked for me. I lost a few pounds but still was obese.
Fast forward to May 2004. My doctor gives me the results of my blood work. My cholesterol count is sky high. I'm suddenly at a major risk for some nasty stuff. My doctor prescribes me Lipitor to bring my count down. I took the pills for two days and began to have unexpected shaking in my hands. Enough was enough. I knew exactly what to do. This was 100 percent curable without medication. I went cold turkey back to veganism. After a two week rough adjustment period my body evened out. Interestingly enough I became ever more strict in my diet by not eating sugar or honey, both of which can be considered animal products.
I slowly began increasing the intensity of my classes and began working out more and more with my students. My body began to change and so did my mood. This year I retired from doing any type of computer work. I'm now a full time martial arts instructor and healer. I use visualization meditations to constantly see where I want to go. Lastly, a new student walked into my school who is a world class personal trainer. She and I barter private lessons with each other. Talk about getting a good workout.
So that's my personal story about weight loss. I still have more weight to loose but I'm finally in a position where I can workout like I want to. In addition to myself I've also seen some amazing body transformations in my students. Even for those who were already in shape.
Here's my advice.
Diet has to be a lifestyle and not a phase. For me it's a philosophy that incorporates health, environmental, and ethical concern. All three keep my eating in line.
Workouts have to be a passion and not drudgery. It's important to workout doing something you love. Martial arts is my life's work so it's easy for me.
Mental health has to go along with the package. If you're mind isn't there you will be out of balance. Incorporate meditation, visualization, prayer, or whatever makes your mind feel calm into your routine.
Come take one of my classes. http://www.fullcirclejujitsu.com
Shameless plug, I know. Blame the yams. Seriously though, we have a lot of fun. You'll get in great shape and learn how to defend yourself at the same time. I'm also free for private workouts.
Let me start with some history on my weight gain. As a little kid I was pretty chunky. Unfortunately I was the "fat kid" at my elementary school. That was bad. It was even worse because I didn't know how to stick up for myself. As I grew older I slimed out more but wasn't in any kind of shape until I started doing martial arts as a teenager. My diet had a few parameters right after I began martial arts training. No red meat, no pork. Everything else was fair game. I leaned out pretty nicely but I had a very young metabolism. When I turned 23 I had a major life change due to the reading of a brilliant book called Diet for a New America by Harold Robbins (http://www.veganessentials.com/catalog/diet-for-a-new-America). Harold himself was the heir to the Baskin-Robbins fortune which he declined to take a penny of due to his beliefs. The book changed my life forever. I immediately became a vegan. I lost even more weight during this time partly due to the fact that I wasn't training that much. When I got back into heavy training I became and even healthier guy. Here's me at 25.
I felt like quite the hot shot. Truth be told this isn't even me at the high of being in shape. The next year I discovered my Capoeira Angola training. I was training several times a day then.
Fast forward my move from San Francisco to Los Angeles. In San Francisco I had the vegan thing down. I knew exactly where to go and what to eat. I also knew how to find it for cheap. LA had a completely different set of rules where food was concerned. Unless you were on the West Side healthy food was very hard to come by. Health food stores charged and arm and a leg. No one knew what to make of my eating choices. I also didn't know the area very well. Somehow slowly but surely I wind up eating meats, eggs, and dairy again. I suspect this is partly due to being around my ex-wife but I really can't blame her. I also began working full time in the entertainment industry as a computer guy. Translation: I sat down most of the time and ate out every day. With no eating philosophy I quickly began gaining weight. Fast forward again to me taking a job working the Help Desk (sitting down all day) at Dreamworks SKG. Dreamworks had the most amazing perk for it's employees. Completely free breakfast and lunch. There was a 4 million dollar food budget and a kitchen staff with a head chef. Man was the food good. There were also soda fountains and bulk snacks in every kitchenette. For the 18 months I was there I ballooned to over 200 pounds.
Fast forward to one of the major events in my life. Contracting double pneumonia. I'll save the details of the illness for another post but here's the correlation to this one. After having my lungs shut down on me I was left with little breathing capacity. I had to sit on a couch for 4 months and take massive amounts of steroids and other things to get me healthy again. Psychologically, becoming out of breath scared the hell out of me. My weight piled on at about 5 pounds a month. I topped out at 247 pounds. You can see pics in my posts below.
It felt helpless. I was on Paxil because I was so depressed (one of the major side effects of paxil is weight gain) and became incredibly gluttonous. I also lost all caring for my appearance. One day I had had enough and slowly started a transformation. I cut my hair and went shopping for new clothes. I was still fat but I looked better. I tried some diet restrictions but nothing worked for me. I lost a few pounds but still was obese.
Fast forward to May 2004. My doctor gives me the results of my blood work. My cholesterol count is sky high. I'm suddenly at a major risk for some nasty stuff. My doctor prescribes me Lipitor to bring my count down. I took the pills for two days and began to have unexpected shaking in my hands. Enough was enough. I knew exactly what to do. This was 100 percent curable without medication. I went cold turkey back to veganism. After a two week rough adjustment period my body evened out. Interestingly enough I became ever more strict in my diet by not eating sugar or honey, both of which can be considered animal products.
I slowly began increasing the intensity of my classes and began working out more and more with my students. My body began to change and so did my mood. This year I retired from doing any type of computer work. I'm now a full time martial arts instructor and healer. I use visualization meditations to constantly see where I want to go. Lastly, a new student walked into my school who is a world class personal trainer. She and I barter private lessons with each other. Talk about getting a good workout.
So that's my personal story about weight loss. I still have more weight to loose but I'm finally in a position where I can workout like I want to. In addition to myself I've also seen some amazing body transformations in my students. Even for those who were already in shape.
Here's my advice.
Diet has to be a lifestyle and not a phase. For me it's a philosophy that incorporates health, environmental, and ethical concern. All three keep my eating in line.
Workouts have to be a passion and not drudgery. It's important to workout doing something you love. Martial arts is my life's work so it's easy for me.
Mental health has to go along with the package. If you're mind isn't there you will be out of balance. Incorporate meditation, visualization, prayer, or whatever makes your mind feel calm into your routine.
Come take one of my classes. http://www.fullcirclejujitsu.com
Shameless plug, I know. Blame the yams. Seriously though, we have a lot of fun. You'll get in great shape and learn how to defend yourself at the same time. I'm also free for private workouts.
The New Battlestar Galactica vs. The Old Battlestar Galactica
Published Sunday, August 21, 2005 by Alessandro Ashanti.
New Battlestar Galactica wins. Period. Only this show could make me want to have sex with Starbuck, Boomer, a Cylon, and The President. Let me show you.
Starbuck then.
Starbuck now.
Boomer then.
Boomer now.
Cylons then.
Cylons now.
The President then.
The President now.
Starbuck then.
Starbuck now.
Boomer then.
Boomer now.
Cylons then.
Cylons now.
The President then.
The President now.
The best advertisement I have for veganism or why the fuck didn't anyone tell me I was so goddamn fat?!
Published by Alessandro Ashanti.
Fuck me. No wonder my marriage started falling apart. I think the following train wreck is me at my fattest. 247 pounds.
Notice that I'm wearing black and I still look fat. What's also scary is that this pic is from 2002 and I still own that shirt. I wore it yesterday.
Oh yeah, that's better. Christmas morning, 2002. Obviously I haven't bothered to cut my hair in the last year. My son must have been scared that I was going to eat him.
New Years Day, 2003. I must have resolved to sit on my fat ass and do nothing.
There you have it. Since then I've lost over 50 pounds due to going back to a vegan lifestyle and lots of martial arts training. I'll have to take some current pictures for contrast.
Notice that I'm wearing black and I still look fat. What's also scary is that this pic is from 2002 and I still own that shirt. I wore it yesterday.
Oh yeah, that's better. Christmas morning, 2002. Obviously I haven't bothered to cut my hair in the last year. My son must have been scared that I was going to eat him.
New Years Day, 2003. I must have resolved to sit on my fat ass and do nothing.
There you have it. Since then I've lost over 50 pounds due to going back to a vegan lifestyle and lots of martial arts training. I'll have to take some current pictures for contrast.
This is so embarrassing I couldn't even write about it until now. A few weeks ago I was out shopping for food with my youngest, Mario. I pulled into the Ralphs parking lot where I was flagged down by a man, and who I assume was his son, in another car. He asks if I'm interested in buying a video camera. He then produces a brand new Sony mini DV camera. I should state that I've been drooling over such a purchase for many years now.
Somehow it's always been just out of my reach.
Being from NYC I'm used to being offered merchandise that has apparently "just fell off the truck." The guy with the camera seemed a little nervous so I just assumed that he wanted to get the money and run. We haggled to a price of $120. I asked him to wait while I went inside to the ATM. I took Mario and rushed inside of Ralphs where I was able make my withdrawal. I hurried back outside (now carrying Mario in my arms) fantasizing over the 1001 uses my new camera would net me. Mr. Camera Guy was patient enough to wait for me. I ask to see the camera one more time. He shows me the cables, the case, he ejects the tape, he shows me the onscreen menu. Everything is beautiful. With my free hand (remember I'm still holding Mario) I clumsily count out 120 dollars. I hand him the money and he hands me back the camera in the case and takes off.
I think I had just opened the car door to place Mario down when I opened up my new gift. Instantaneously a cartoon lolly-pop appeared over my head with the works "SUCKER" written in bold type on it. I had been had by the oldest scam in the book. The Pigeon Drop. Want to see what my $120 got me? Take a look.
Oh it's a camera alright. A film camera, although I can't seem to find out how to take a picture with it or load film. Oh, and it's also a radio. My only consolation is that there has to be a special place in hell for the man in China responsible for manufacturing these knock offs.
P.T. Barnum wasn't kidding when he said the immortal words, "There's sucker born every minute." Guess I'm a born again sucker.
Somehow it's always been just out of my reach.
Being from NYC I'm used to being offered merchandise that has apparently "just fell off the truck." The guy with the camera seemed a little nervous so I just assumed that he wanted to get the money and run. We haggled to a price of $120. I asked him to wait while I went inside to the ATM. I took Mario and rushed inside of Ralphs where I was able make my withdrawal. I hurried back outside (now carrying Mario in my arms) fantasizing over the 1001 uses my new camera would net me. Mr. Camera Guy was patient enough to wait for me. I ask to see the camera one more time. He shows me the cables, the case, he ejects the tape, he shows me the onscreen menu. Everything is beautiful. With my free hand (remember I'm still holding Mario) I clumsily count out 120 dollars. I hand him the money and he hands me back the camera in the case and takes off.
I think I had just opened the car door to place Mario down when I opened up my new gift. Instantaneously a cartoon lolly-pop appeared over my head with the works "SUCKER" written in bold type on it. I had been had by the oldest scam in the book. The Pigeon Drop. Want to see what my $120 got me? Take a look.
Oh it's a camera alright. A film camera, although I can't seem to find out how to take a picture with it or load film. Oh, and it's also a radio. My only consolation is that there has to be a special place in hell for the man in China responsible for manufacturing these knock offs.
P.T. Barnum wasn't kidding when he said the immortal words, "There's sucker born every minute." Guess I'm a born again sucker.
This is a pic of my students from the promotion we just had on August 11th. I'm so proud of these guys!
Didn't I write this blog before? Hmmm. I'll have to look.
Anyway. Getting to sleep has become a major problem with me these last few months. No matter how tired I am or how much I beg and plead to the universe, the sandman refuses to pay me a visit. Someone suggested I try reading. I wound up reading and entire Harry Potter book, finishing just before the sun came up. I should maybe try reading something more mundane. Now I have been perscribed a chemical backup by my doctor but without insurance I can't get ahold of the good stuff. For now it's Ativan to the rescue. Ativan is great stuff but it leaves me kind of dopey. Not the best state to be in if you have to teach a martial arts class the next day. The other drawback to Ativan is that it is considered one of the most addicting drugs on the planet. Yikes! Just what I need. So I'm careful not to dabble in it too often. Wow, you shoulde see the typos i'm starting to mke. I think this stuff is kicking in . wheeeeeeee. Mr. sandman, send me a dream (bom bom bom bom) make her the sweetest dream i've ever seen. Mr' sand mand bring me a dream.
hey where the white women at?
Hal, opne the pod doors hal.
I'm sorry i can't do taht dave.
Hi, my name is hal 9000....
Ok. nighty night. will some one read me a story?
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Anyway. Getting to sleep has become a major problem with me these last few months. No matter how tired I am or how much I beg and plead to the universe, the sandman refuses to pay me a visit. Someone suggested I try reading. I wound up reading and entire Harry Potter book, finishing just before the sun came up. I should maybe try reading something more mundane. Now I have been perscribed a chemical backup by my doctor but without insurance I can't get ahold of the good stuff. For now it's Ativan to the rescue. Ativan is great stuff but it leaves me kind of dopey. Not the best state to be in if you have to teach a martial arts class the next day. The other drawback to Ativan is that it is considered one of the most addicting drugs on the planet. Yikes! Just what I need. So I'm careful not to dabble in it too often. Wow, you shoulde see the typos i'm starting to mke. I think this stuff is kicking in . wheeeeeeee. Mr. sandman, send me a dream (bom bom bom bom) make her the sweetest dream i've ever seen. Mr' sand mand bring me a dream.
hey where the white women at?
Hal, opne the pod doors hal.
I'm sorry i can't do taht dave.
Hi, my name is hal 9000....
Ok. nighty night. will some one read me a story?
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
I'm sorry if I never told you "I love you" enough. I know it's too late for us now despite all the years. When I die and meet you again in our next lives I'll live everyday to tell you just how much you mean to me.
Well thank you google. Can't we put some parental controls in or something?
I'm minding my own business the other day when all of a sudden I get a comment notification on my blog about Salma Hayek's ass or something. It says simply, "Hi Dad!" Now I'm thrown off for a second because all of my kids are in school during the day and not one of them knows about the train wreck that is the site. Sure enough my oldest son Armand gets the bright idea to google himself during his 7th period computer class and what pops up but this damn site. (http://www.google.com/search?q=armand+bovoso&sourceid=mozilla-search&start=0&start=0&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&client=firefox-a&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official)
Well Armand, yes it's true. Your Dad is freaking nuts. Welcome to the family.
I'm minding my own business the other day when all of a sudden I get a comment notification on my blog about Salma Hayek's ass or something. It says simply, "Hi Dad!" Now I'm thrown off for a second because all of my kids are in school during the day and not one of them knows about the train wreck that is the site. Sure enough my oldest son Armand gets the bright idea to google himself during his 7th period computer class and what pops up but this damn site. (http://www.google.com/search?q=armand+bovoso&sourceid=mozilla-search&start=0&start=0&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&client=firefox-a&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official)
Well Armand, yes it's true. Your Dad is freaking nuts. Welcome to the family.